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Sherwin Nuland is a first generation American. His father Meyer Nudelman, was a hard working, unassimilated, unhappy man. He made no attempt to learn the English language. From Sherwin’s earliest years he his parents and his brother with his Aunt and grandmother; neither Meyer nor his in laws made any attempt to reconcile until long after Sherwin’s mother was gone.. He was a man with a short fuse; a man who constantly complained of being a “sick man”. The Nudelman family suffered many hardships common to the poor everywhere, but especially in the immigrant areas of New York City in the early 20th Century. Sherwin’s oldest brother died very young, his next oldest brother suffered rheumatic fever as a teen and in their fear the Nudelman family turned him (unnecessarily) into an invalid—it took many years to turn for this young man to allow himself to live a normal life. Sherwin was left to be his father’s companion, (except on his way to and from work) whenever he had to venture from home; this became more frequent and more burdensome after Mrs. Nudelman died (when Sherwin was just 11 years). Since both boys never knew how their father would react to even the most off hand comment they lived on constant edge. In addition to that the reason Meyer needed so much help was his very odd gait and inability to control his small muscles. The man dearly loved his sons, but had no idea how to let them know this. As Dr. Nuland grew up he determined to get away from home as soon as possible, and never move back. As his father’s disability continued to grow worse his son’s embarrassment kept pace. It is the rare adolescent who does not suffer shame at the hands of their parents, when that parent has something to set him apart it is becomes even worse. As the author relates his ever changing and confusing relationship with his dad we realize that this is not just a dysfunctional relationship, but a mystery of sorts. It is not until he becomes a physician he discovers the diagnosis that has so destroyed his father’s body and soul. As a result of his childhood this extremely successful man has had to overcome some very serious emotional problems. His personal relationships suffered as well. If one were to just listen to this tale without the final knowledge of cause and effect it would seem as if all Nuland wanted to do was whine; instead he has invited us to join him in a spiritual reconciliation with his father and with his own shortcomings and fears. The author reads the book himself, which makes the story even more moving and interesting. With the knowledge the narrator has lived the story the listener begins to feel like he is engaged in conversation with a fascinating acquaintance. Dr. Nuland has an excellent speaking voice, very soothing and kind; a voice that certainly belies the 70 some years he claims as his age. I highly recommend this audio experience.
Reviewed by Martha Hopkins, February 2003
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Contact: Yvonne Klein (ymk@reviewingtheevidence.com)
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